3 months postpartum vs 20 months postpartum.
There are definitely some physical changes here – when you enter the 2nd year after having a baby your body responds way better and can tighten back up to pre-pregnancy condition.
This is all wonderful but the reason why I’m writing this blog is to share my personal mindset transformation in hopes to help other new moms.
Three months postpartum for me was a mixture of emotions. I was so overjoyed to have my little guy, love was just exploding for him. At this very same time I felt extremely overwhelmed. I was constantly questioning myself…”Was I doing thing right?”, “Is he okay?”, “Am I going back to work too early?” and the list goes on…
I was also so scared to take my foot off the gas pedal with my business in fear of losing everything I have worked so hard for.
I found myself in a place of constant mood swings and just trying to grasp my new normal. It was F’n hard!!! I would put a smile on my face and try to get as much done as possible to feel like I was accomplishing something but there was a feeling of emptiness and maybe even loneliness.
As new moms we don’t like to talk about this…we are supposed to be overjoyed, right? Well we are but we are also emotionally drained and overwhelmed.
So I’m here to tell you that it’s A-OK to feel this way and have mixed emotions. It’s also okay to talk about it.
I can look back now and realize why I went through that…it makes a little more sense now.
We all go through our ups and downs but it’s how we face and get through our downs.
For me personally it was about acceptance. Accepting that I am now a mom and things just have to be different but that doesn’t mean it has to be bad. I also accepted it was okay to ask for some help.
Another huge help was writing down my priorities on a pice of paper. As simple as this sounds this process was extremely helpful. It allowed me to say “no” to things and make choices to help me be authentic to what is most important to me.
So many new moms go through these challenges and I can’t stress enough that you are not alone.
In my opinion the Mama Blues are a symptom that is serious but it also can be controlled through some mindset and organization work. A simple exercise like listing your priorities may help.
Here is an example of my list of priorities:
- Me (my happiness, fitness, health and mindset) – If you don’t put yourself first ALL your priorities suffer. It’s okay to put yourself first Mamas!
- Jackson and my husband
- My Business – To me this is a VERY close 2nd. Without my business I could not provide the life I do for my son.
- Extended Family
- My Pets
- Social time with friends and family
If anything is presented to me that does add any value to my priorities I don’t do it. It’s really that simple. Even smaller tasks like housework can take a back seat. I know it needs done but if anything suffers on my list of priorities it’s just not that important.
I have also learned to say no to events, gathering including some family gatherings and even birthday parties. If you say yes to all these things you will be spread VERY thin and your priorities may suffer and you will continue feeling overwhelmed and helpless.
Don’t feel bad, feel empowered that you are making a decision for you.
I challenge you to try this and please share with me how it goes 🙂